About Me

Fort Bragg, NC, United States
I'm a stay at home dad raising four beautiful children. I am the proud spouse of an Army Lieutenant Colonel. I do my best to keep up with the kids and all of their activities. I enjoy playing the bass and the occasional bass guitar building project. You can follow me on twitter if you so desire...@ArmySpouse007.

Monday, July 18, 2011

So what's the point?

Recently I began to take a retrospective look at why I bother to blog and write about my life as a military spouse/stay at home dad. After all, it takes time to sit down and think through another blog post. I have to add pictures and try to come up with something that people will read. As I was thinking along this line I was invited, as some of you already know, to be a guest on the new Ricki Lake Show. Yes, she's the same one who used to be a little bit of a female version of Jerry Springer. I agreed to go on her show because when they called me, they wanted to talk about my experiences as a military spouse. Understand, I was a bit hesitant at first. Was I going to be surprised or ambushed by something from my past? Was this going to be just another one of those shows where someone learns some deep dark secret has been kept from them? What I found out, though, was quite the opposite. She has changed the way she does her shows. She truly does want to focus on military spouses and what we go through. Gone are the "who's the baby's daddy" type shows. This is a grown up Ricki Lake Show.

Sure, it was cool to be on a tv show. Yes, it's neat to be treated like a star for a day. But really, WHAT'S THE POINT? I'm glad you asked. The point to all of this, the reason I blog, the reason I flew out to LA to be on a show is very simple. It's about supporting military spouses just like you and me who are nearly always the silent warriors of these wars that have been going on for so long now. We constantly told on the news, on commercials, in magazines, and in all sorts of places how much people support the troops today. "Support the troops" is a familiar mantra. Of course, no one ever wants to see the horrors that awaited soldiers as they came home from Vietnam. Our soldier spouses are treated as heros every where they turn. That's how it should be. And yet, military spouses and family members often are forgotten. We do so much to support our soul mates who are fighting for our freedoms, and we do it selflessly.

Military spouses are the unsung heros of these wars. We are the ones who hold it all together, who support our soldiers while they serve their country. And while some may forget the sacrifices of family members, I will continue to do everything I can to support our spouses. That's the point. It's about doing everything we can lift each other up, to be the one who stands in the gap for our fellow spouse who doesn't think he/she can go on any longer. It's about being there to help bear the burden that we all are weighed down by at one time or another. It's about being there to look another spouse, one who feels like he or she is at the end of their rope, in the eye and tell them, "you are not alone." So if you are reading this blog and you are having one of "those days," just remember that you truly aren't alone in this struggle. YOU are the point to all of this. YOU are worth it!

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You can follow me on Twitter if you so choose... @Armyspouse007


  1. You have an amazing blog! Thank you so much for sharing!!!

  2. first, I do look forward to what you write and I wish you'd write more often...but i understand why you don't but sure wish you did.. :) I'm glad you went... something you'll never forget.. You are very important not only to your kids but all of us out here...... you do get passed around...and people do read what you have to say.... You are important... just remember that.... Hooah!!!!

  3. I just stumbled upon your blog, but I really enjoyed it. You never get to hear the perspective of a stay at home dad, and especially never a stay at home dad whose partner is in the services. I hope you continue to post!!

  4. We appreciate your service, we appreciate your wife's service and we would love to see a picture of her blowing out the eye of some Taliban dude.

    Along with my blog at www.maddadzblog.com, I'm writing a book about a Command Sergeant Major based out of Texas. Love the military, love what you guys do, would love to see the one-eyed Taliban picture when you get a chance.

  5. I agree with all of this. I have been in so many situations where spouses spend so much time fighting with each other. How soon we forget that we are all in this together.

  6. My spouse was Mr Mom to our two kids during the early years of my military career (1978-1999). Our son was just 2 when I went off to basic training and our daughter was about 5 Back then it was pretty unusual for a man to be in that role. I was also in a nontraditional role - I worked on the flightline as an avionics technician on fighter aircraft. I enjoy reading your posts about the challenges of managing life on the homefront. It is a challenging lifestyle choice. I wish you all the best as you navigate through these wonderful years. I am so grateful that my spouse took his role as Mr. Mom seriously and connected with our children and me in such a special way. More recently,with the kids grown and gone, we served in Peace Corps (Ukraine/2005-2007) and in AmeriCorps*VISTA (2007-2010). Keep on doing the good work. Life is good, if you pay attention!

    Virginia J. Pulver, MSgt, USAF (Ret)

  7. How cool! Let us know when the show airs... I'd love to check it out.... And, HOOAH from the here Army wife... :) http://www.OliviaBlueMusic.com/

  8. After seeing you and your blog featured on NBC national news I was relieved and happy to hear someone in a loving military spouse setting tell his side of the story and be able to excel in a "nontraditional" role. As someone who will be stepping into that role in the coming months I certainly will be looking forward to your posts and utilizing them for support, understanding, and familiarity. Thank you for sharing your story.